A student seems to be struggling: the signs teachers notice and what to do next

The short version for a busy teacher

Watch for a change in a student's usual pattern that lasts: falling grades or missed work, pulling away from friends, irritability or tearfulness, sleeping in class, or talk of hopelessness or being a burden. If you notice it, talk with the student privately, listen without judging, and bring in your school counselor the same day according to your campus protocol. If a student talks about wanting to die, has a plan or seems in immediate danger, do not leave them alone, follow your district's suicide-risk procedure right away, and use 911 or 988 when the situation calls for it.

That is the core. The rest of this guide is the detail behind it, drawn from what we teach educators in our adult programs at Grant Halliburton Foundation. It is general information, not a substitute for your district's policies or for training, and it never asks a teacher to act as a counselor or diagnose anyone.

Why teachers so often see it first

Parents see a teenager at breakfast and dinner, often behind a closed door. Teachers, coaches and counselors see the same student for hours a day, next to classmates, under academic and social pressure. Our educator resources put it simply: the school staff who see students every day are often the first to notice signs of mental health issues.

Students also talk to each other before they talk to adults. Our Peer Helpers PLUS program page cites research that seven in ten adolescents experiencing depressive or suicidal thoughts confide in a friend or peer before approaching an adult. That means the first signal a teacher receives may be secondhand: a worried friend lingering after class, or a comment overheard in the hallway. Treat those reports seriously, thank the student who brought it to you, and act on it the same way you would act on something you saw yourself.

What depression can look like from the front of the room

Depression in young people does not always look like sadness. The CDC lists feeling sad, hopeless or irritable a lot of the time, losing interest in things that used to be fun, changes in eating or sleep, trouble paying attention, and self-injury among the signs of depression in children. In a classroom, those signs tend to show up in ways that can be mistaken for attitude or laziness.

No single item on that list means a student is depressed. Teenagers have bad weeks, breakups and exam stress, and some withdrawal from adults is a normal part of growing up. What deserves attention is a change from that student's own baseline that lasts for weeks, shows up in more than one setting and is getting worse rather than better. If a colleague, coach or counselor has noticed the same thing, that is useful information, so compare notes through the proper channels rather than keeping your observation to yourself.

• Work that used to come in on time now arrives late, incomplete or not at all.
• A student who participated now keeps their head down, or sleeps through class.
• Irritability, snapping at classmates or arguing with adults that seems out of character.
• Sitting alone at lunch, or drifting away from a friend group.
• Frequent visits to the nurse with headaches or stomachaches, or rising absences.
• Writing, art or comments that return to themes of death, emptiness or not mattering.
• Dropping a sport, club or activity that used to define them.

Signs that mean act today, not next week

Some signs go beyond depression and point toward suicidal crisis. The National Institute of Mental Health lists warning signs that someone may be thinking about suicide, and it says to get help as soon as possible, particularly if the behavior is new or has increased recently. In a school setting, any of the following should trigger your campus suicide-risk procedure the same day, without waiting to be sure.

• Talking or writing about wanting to die, great guilt or shame, or being a burden to others.
• Saying they feel empty, hopeless, trapped or have no reason to live.
• Making a plan or researching ways to die.
• Withdrawing from friends, saying goodbye or giving away important belongings.
• Taking dangerous risks, extreme mood swings, or using drugs or alcohol more often.
• Eating or sleeping much more or much less than usual.

Starting the conversation with a student

Find a private moment that does not single the student out in front of others, such as staying a minute after class or a quiet word in the hallway. Start with something specific you have noticed rather than a judgment: you have seemed tired lately and your work has slipped, and I wanted to check how you are doing. Then stop and listen longer than feels natural.

If what you hear worries you, it is appropriate to ask directly whether the student is thinking about suicide. Many adults fear the question itself will cause harm. The 988 Lifeline's #BeThe1To initiative cites evidence that asking at-risk individuals if they are suicidal does not increase suicides or suicidal thoughts; our guide on whether asking about suicide plants the idea covers this in depth. The same source advises never promising to keep those thoughts secret. Tell the student you care about them and that you are going to bring in someone who can help, and then do it.

Stay calm and stay with them. You do not need the right words. You need to be the adult who noticed, asked, and did not let it drop.

The hand-off: who you bring in, and how fast

A teacher's job is to notice, connect and follow through, not to assess or treat. Every district has its own procedures for who is notified and how, and those procedures come first. In general, the school counselor or the designated campus contact is the first call for any concern, and an administrator joins when there is any sign of suicide risk. Parents and guardians are typically contacted by the counselor or administrator, following district policy.

If you believe a student is in immediate danger and you cannot reach the right person, do not leave the student alone, and call 911. Outside school hours, the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline takes calls, texts and chats at any time. It can also help to know where families can go next. Our free Mental Health Navigation Line at 972-525-8181 helps parents find therapists and treatment, and our guide for parents on what to do when a teenager has changed is something a counselor can share.

Texas schools also have their own training requirements for staff who work with students. Our guide on what Texas asks of schools on mental health and suicide prevention summarizes them.

Mistakes kind teachers make

The most common is waiting to be sure. A teacher notices something, decides to watch a little longer, and the moment passes. You do not need certainty to mention a concern to a counselor; that is exactly what counselors are for. The second is treating the change only as discipline. A student who stops turning in work may need consequences, but they may also need someone to ask what is going on underneath.

The third is promising confidentiality to keep a student talking. It feels kind in the moment and creates a trap later. The fourth is carrying it alone, by trying to be the student's sole support instead of connecting them to people trained for it. The last is following up once and never again. A short check-in a few days later tells a student that the conversation was real.

Taking care of yourself after a hard conversation

Educators who have sat with a student in crisis often go back to a full class an hour later as if nothing happened. That takes a toll. The 988 Lifeline reminds people supporting someone through a difficult time that it is important to take care of themselves, and the Lifeline is open to supporters as well as to people in crisis. Talk with your counselor or administrator about what happened, use your district's employee assistance resources if you have them, and give yourself credit for acting.

Whether you teach in Dallas or in a smaller district elsewhere in North Texas, you are not expected to carry this on your own. The system around you, from counselors to administrators to community providers, exists so that one caring adult can notice and hand off without having to solve everything.

Bringing this training to your campus

Our adult Building Blocks of Mental Health presentations are built for teachers, parents and professionals, and they can be delivered in person or virtually, at a school, a community meeting or a conference. One of them, Finding Light in the Darkness, focuses on recognizing the warning signs of depression and suicidal crisis in youth, starting supportive conversations and connecting young people to resources. Others cover stress, anxiety and burnout, emotional regulation, the teenage brain and a trauma-informed look at youth behavior.

Many campuses pair staff training with programs for students, so that both the adults and the students know what to look for. Our guide on choosing between a one-time assembly and an ongoing program explains how those pieces fit together. If you are a principal, counselor or district leader in Dallas or anywhere in North Texas and want to talk about training for your staff, reach out and we will find a format that fits your calendar.

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